New Me

I have been thinking.

I'm lucky to have Justin to even notice me out of millions of girls and I'm asking for more?

Maybe because everything that was happening to me wasn't good so I thought my luck should be straight and keep on running.

I'll continue on singing even though my voice sounds like crap.

I have to forget about Tomato.

And I hope that one day, I have the guts to ask my dad for the numbers of his singer friends. A LOT, BTW.

Hope I can get a record deal.

Always like this...

Things about me that I'm insecure:

1. My voice

Nowadays, I think I have really crappy voice and cannot reach my dreams. EVER. I mean if you have crappy voice then you can't become a singer, right?

2. My looks

I think I'm fat. I think I'm ugly. I have colored skin. Should I say anything else?

3. My personality

I'm emotional and sensitive. And easily depressed. When I'm crazy, I'm crazy. When I'm down, I cry. A lot. Who would want someone who has roller coaster mood?

4. My job

I'm a prefect. Most hated job in school.

For once, I want to feel accepted. I want to feel loved. I want to feel beautiful. I want to feel like I can do something. Now, I believe that when I grow up, no one would want me and I can't live my dreams. So, are you happy, guys?

Messed up.

Our class is planning a class trip.

Really wishing we can go to the beach but most people would rather go to a theme park.... where I rarely ride roller coasters. =.=

Tomato is voting for that so I did it too.

Don't really know whether it's a good idea. lol.

Great place to confess though.

I have a plan, okay?

Anyway, he asked the messenger today, "is it (my name)?"

When the messenger told me, I totally freaked out.

So, I was like thinking should I confess or not?

I feel like dying. Haha.

Oh yeah, I was effin hyper yesterday, at first.

CUZ JUSTIN FREAKING DREW BIEBER FOLLOWED ME ON TUMBLR!

I was like what the f?

My dream almost there.

Now my job is to post videos of me singing on tumblr.

But my computer cam and microphone like shit so I dunno what to do.

Hmmmm.....

My life is seriously messed up.

I really thought everything was going well when one of my closest friend texted me.

Then called me, crying.

I was frustrated because I couldn't help. >.<

When I tried to call back, couldn't reach.

I was like so freaking worried. If anything happens, I'm never gonna forgive myself.

Then, that person texted me again, to assure me everything's fine.

THANK GOD~ But keep praying for you, brother.

I love you always.

~azunyann

Hmmm....

Since like ever, I don't feel beautiful. AGAIN.

I mean like, what is wrong with me?

I guess I just needed someone to tell me that

The talk with the nicest guy: leaf, still didn't work.

I mean.... sigh.....

I really need someone to tell me that.

Not say,"You're beautiful inside."

Like, am I not beautiful outside?

I can't be a singer like this, or even have someone to like me.

People nowadays judge people with their looks so....

I got no help in that matter...

FINE.

Don't need to be a singer then.

Be a hobo.

B2ST

I'm now addicted to 'Fiction' by B2ST

You may not believe it but I have it on replay now~

I bought great outfits for Raya but I really imagined it as my date outfit.

I wanna go out on a date with tomato so bad

I need it...

2nd August 2011

Fell down after coming out of the bus. I don’t wanna talk about it. Very unlucky day. Someone asked me before, “What if Justin murdered someone? Would you still be a Belieber?” I would yes. Why? Because he’s family. What he did maybe wrong, but you wouldn’t stop loving a family member. Right? I think Timmy is handsome and really sweet, but there’s something in him that’s really down. I think he couldn’t get over Si Jing who is currently flirting with Kelvin n Joe every freaking day. I just feel like sitting him down with me alone and ask him to spill it all out. Prefectorial board: I don’t wanna be a part of a family that has hatred and like to pick their favourites. STRING: I don’t wanna be the section leader where I had to pick up the pieces every time someone screws up. 3B: Many bitches. Can’t handle it already. JB: Said I wanted to forget about him but random time of the day, I get reminded of him. I love him. Even seeing his mv(s) make me teary. I hate it when that happens. Leaf wrote sth on my facebook page that really made me happy yesterday. He’s the only one with the courage to write sth like that to me. The rest, sigh… I just want someone to hug me when I’m upset and never let go until I quiet down. When you see movies and suddenly this guy hugs the girl because she was upset and wanted to cry. Life’s no fairytale but I want that so bad. Where everything goes right for everybody. My wish is too big.

Thank You

How is it you're the only one who could make me smile with the same line that my other friends use on me?

I think it's because you're a guy.

Anyway, I just couldn't thank you enough for making me smile before I sleep.

Whenever before I sleep, I'd end up thinking about negative stuffs and have really heavy dreams.

Just maybe, maybe, tonight I'll have a sweet dream.

Thank you~