Thought of and remember...

I think and i think and i think in my free time...
I do realise that he likes her and it's kinda obvious too...
I'm telling them," I don't care, I don't care, I don't care..."
Hahaha....
I'm stupid as hell....
So damn stupid...

I really am confused

I opened the mailbox yesterday and found my index number on a letter...
I knew something was up.
I was offered to go Singapore to study...
I really have no idea wat 2 do cuz it's just too hard....
I ended up writing on xxxxx and frankie just commented...
I really dunno what's his real feelings...
..... i really think that he's upset that I'm maybe going...
confused in so many ways
wat is his true feelings and u noe guys, if they tell, they're weak, as they said....

2/3/4 days ago...

I was studying (not really..)
then suddenly a paper reached my place....
I opened it and was hoping it was a trick...
it was written," LCP asked you, why you like him? wat part of him do u like?"
It was making sure every moment that it's real....
I even asked the evidence of him asking this....
I can't tell that "loving someone doesn't need an excuse"
so i had to ask for MUGI'S help...
I followed her advice and when he received the paper, he hid his face behind the curtain...
I was seriously blushing at one point but u can't c cuz i'm dark coloured...
I swore I was gonna faint... x_x

Best Dream EVER!!!

I was supposed to go on duty that day
But then Frankie passed by and I asked someone else to help me with the duty
Then I followed him wherever he went....
Suddenly everything changed...
Frankie took his motorcycle and came to my house
I was dressed in a dress and him, in a suit....
WE WERE DATING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahahahahaha....
he looks really nice...
but too bad it's not even real... :'(

XP

Yui, Mio, Mugi and me maybe going to Yui's house for sleepover one day b4 going to Pavilion. My mom said can lor... xDD happy!!!!

AND I REALLY NID PPL TO GO TO PROM WITH ME..... Rach dun wan cuz she said," I dun wear dresses..." Aww... come on... PLS.... BEGGING YOU......
you see... i very de love you....

:: Reasons ::

me and yong xin talked on the way back home...
he talked about music and i really hope he does learn for his sake
after he left, i can't remember why i learnt musical instruments in March in the first place....
I think cuz of him... i was unconsiously doing the decision in my head with little notice of why....
now that i think of it, it's useless... except for the band's sake
he doesn't really notice and i'm really really bumped...
at home or when no one talks to me, I would be deeply depressed and lonely...
nvr been that, not since february...

worried

i saw my mom's status about chest pain and at that time, she called me to say that she was at mamak stall...
when she came home, she didn't say anything to me...
I dun wan to ask her such thing cuz i scared she worried about me worrying her.. (get it?)
i really hope she's okay... :(
i have to perform in front of the whole school... TT^TT
and i thought he ignored me...
he talked to me... :)
but b4 i knew that he wud talk to me, i did sumthing (for me) that's bad
when we were marching, he had flaws....
the real prefects no nid  march cuz nid train the small ones
so i noticed bout it and mentioned it loudly but nvr mention his name or look in his eyes...
i really thought that he wud belasah me... ><

What happened??

I think Frankie has completely ignoring me....
I do...
I dunno what happened...
Rach, help!!!

The day...

I reached KFC at 10.10 am......
I thought there was no one there....
Then i saw kai xin there... :)
I realised that a lot of ppl r wearing vest... -.- including me...
we waited for ppl to come and finally, last person, LEE LING YI CAME!!!!
we all had special plan for TONG WEI CHEN today...
his birthday is on the 12th but since today everybody's there, we surprised him...
LIM JIA JIE AND KOH JIA YANG was there with my favourite cake, CHEESECAKE!!!!
unfortunately, i can't eat it... :( i'm fasting!!!
we all had to pay for the cake but then i no nid cuz i dun eat mar,
when CHAU PING was paying the money, i initially took his 5 bucks...
then bcuz he had to pay, i ended up with oni 1 buck... TT^TT
but it was fun playing him...
he chased me, trying to take back his precious money....
i was laughing the whole time...
i ended up putting the money on the cover of a dustbin and ran away XD
he ran and hit my head with his money i think...
but it was like a feather dropped on my head, rarely feel it XD
then, me, YI TENG, HUI YING and YEE FUN went to the bookfair by ourselves, leaving the rest of the gang at the park...
I bought THE HUNGER GAMES 3rd book there (the 1st book was given by DRAGON AND LEAF for my birthday this year)
but then i can't buy the 2nd wan bcuz it's a twin set with the first wan...
i was like, so annoyed...
I waited for the others to finish shopping 4 1 hour, i think....
We finally went back to KLCC and i sent the gang to the food court...
LAI YONG XIN wanted to hug me (???) when i said my goodbye...
I screamed a bit...
His arms were big... >< I ended up hugging PUI NEE... her hug is NICE... PUI NEE: very sensitive bout me fasting... today, she asked me whether i wanted a gum... i waited for her response as i usually do... and it was damn priceless... she was like sorry sorry... oh yea, i tickled her all the way... JING WERN was my girlfren for just 5 minutes... HEY!!! no fair... frankie made my day by making me laugh... thx... I oso wanna say sorry for my attitude earlier... I was a jerk... ><
p/s: bought THE HUNGER GAMES 2nd book at Kinokuniya...
YAY!!!
hope i didn't miss anything out... :P

HOliday!!!

hooray!hooray! it's a holi holiday....
muahahahahahhahaha
tmr no guitar class....... woohoo.........
get to spend time with everyone who comes tmr at klcc........
i'm sure that i WILL go....
it just intrigues me how u wanna react to that....... ;)
so fun.........

Weak or strong...

I just think i'm so weak bcuz i always fall for the wrong guy...
but i oso think i'm strong for facing rejection twice in a year.......
well, i'm thinking that i am weaker than i'm stronger...
I'm freaking sensitive and reacts to unnecessary things...
haizz...

Renesmee2004

Complicated

Well, this Saturday is a holiday (until nxt nxt Tues) so my class some go KLCC bookfair wif me included!!! YAY!!!
I'm not even gonna go to guitar class cuz I'm too lazy... :P
It has been complicated...
I might have misinterpreted something frankenstein wrote...
but one thing frankie wrote that bugs me the most is that frankie thinks racist is just complicated....
frankie could be talking about the political stuff that's happening now or talking bout me...
My sane mind told me that it was the politics but my heart told me that it was me....
haizzz.....
maybe we are just not meant to be together AT ALL....
it's hard to lie to Frankie that I've given up long time ago.......
It was just a lie....

..........................

Moving ON...

is it that hard?

I wanna noe whether i'm not allowed to chase my dream at all...

And I love you so and I just can't let u go....
Is it that hard to ask me to transfer skul if u think confessing 4 the 2nd time is crossing the line...

DEAD

I declare this blog dead... TT^TT
until someone come and save it...

WOWO

Time is moving seriously fast now...
I can't believe i'm already a grandma...
Haizz... but i still dun hv wrinkles... XD
and there hor... tmr start fasting...
Hope i hv a gud fasting month... :)
But then, i feel like i am gonna hv a fever... :P
just now, got choir competition.. (i didn't enter it though)
we all were so high...
let me tell u sumthing... the boys' singing at the practice and at the competition was very different... it was like they bcame another person.. :0
I was telling them," if u fell scared, luk at me, i'll support u.."
then, the SONG LIM go and say," i'm so fascinated with ur smile.." while making that king of girly blinks... I was like OMG!!!!
then while practice, oaf kept getting nearer to ZF every time.. ;P
i kept telling WHY 2 separate them..
and then there is this project for us 2 do til Thursday...
me and ZF was doing it while 2 boring science periods.. :P
and it turned out GREAT!!! XP
and here's a surprise:
We won 3 out of 4 Eng month competition!!!!
YAY!!!!
Sketch, Bulletin board and poetry...
Essay unfortunately... NOBODy!!!
Poetry: 1st: winnie the pooh 2nd:ZF 3rd:MOI!!! consolation: Emily
I swore that every one agree to simply write but i know tser jet didn't cuz he is seriously BETTER than me.. :P

Aww...

ZF asked me to delete the group...
AWWW... she said," Delete it, or else..."
Her threat was damn scary... >< She meant it...
Rach was extremely orally violent these two days..
It was because of the virus... XD
I was defending it the whole time...
It shud thank me or it wud not be alive by now, serious!!!!
It wud be hurt by all the things she was about to say...
THANK 2 ME, it doesn't hv to go through it and hope that it doesn't happen again, virus...
I oso can't believe myself 4 defending it... :0
maybe i am being a gud fren and I AM (some ppl says so) XD
so yay....
I've done my job of being a gud gud fren... :)

walao...

just now, there was a speech about sexual harassment, etc....
i felt very uncomfortable when they started to talk about whether we should b girlfren and boyfren...
All the memories came back...
by that time, i felt like vomiting lar... serious...
it was like a mini-sized train crashed at my head at 100km/h
TT^TT
i was sick....
and then me, rach, azunyan and kuran made a group that is anti-virus...
XD
(secret... XD)

For: Myself

Joey said the reason i did what i did was that i was lonely and dislike myself....
I AM LONELY and DISLIKE MYSELF....
she said i have to count on myself to love ME!!!
if u dun luv urself, how can other ppl luv u???
That's what she said...
Rach and Joey also said that my heart has a hole...
Of coz it does.....
Missing one piece after broken and putting it back TWICE...
my personal feeling is that i need a guy to protect me and luv me for who i am...
so, i dunno...

UsUi TaKuMi!!!!!

Name: Usui Takumi

Nickname: Vampire

Wat i like about him: his emo-ness

i just can't help but felt annoyed by him this week...

LOL here, LOL there.....

nothing to do is it!!!???

and he's started being secretive...

so serious....

Wat to do??

He has started to do what i feared most.....

Here's a picture for ya....

Overboard ~ Justin Bieber

It feels like we've been out at sea, whoa
So back and forth that's how it seems, whoa
And when I wanna talk you say to me
That if it's meant to be it will be
Whoa oh no
So crazy is this thing we call love
And now that we've got it we just can't give up
I'm reaching out for you
Got me out here in the water
And I

I'm overboard
And I need your love to pull me up
I can't swim on my own
It's too much
Feels like I'm drowning without your love
So throw yourself out to me
My lifesaver
(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)
My lifesaver
(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)
Whoa


I never understood you when you'd say, whoa
Wanted me to meet you halfway, whoa
Felt like I was doing my part
You kept thinking you were coming up short
It's funny how things change cause now I see
Oh whoa
So crazy is this thing we call love
And now that we've got it we just can't give up
I'm reaching out for you
Got me out here in the water
And I

I'm overboard (overboard)
And I need your love to pull me up
I can't swim on my own
It's too much (it's too much)
Feels like I'm drowning (ohh)
Without your love
So throw yourself out to me
My lifesaver


Oh
It's supposed to be some give and take I know
But you're only taking and not giving anymore
So what do I do
Cause I still love you
(I still love you baby)
And you're the only one who can save me

Whoa, whoa, whoa, oh

I'm overboard
And I need your love to pull me up (pull me up)
I can't swim on my own
It's too much (it's too much)
Feels like I'm drowning without your love
(I'm drowning baby, I'm drowning)
So throw yourself out to me
(I can't swim)
My lifesaver

(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)
My lifesaver
It's crazy crazy crazy
(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)
Lifesaver oh
(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)
My lifesaver
(Lifesaver, oh lifesaver)

Yeah

Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow...

Yesterday, i bought justin bieber cd : my worlds (my world + my world 2.0)
Woohoo...
Lovin IT!!!!
Today, we went to listen a speech about poetry...
there was a really funny part... i laughed until my stomach hurts...
when there was a boring part, i think of USUI...
my cold-one....
fish ask me to forget...
How? eee....
My sis is sick... i'm worried...
We also did laugh on the bus on the way back...
everything oso we "Wah!!!" even when we say the tree is green, "wah!!!"
stupid... XD
She didn't except my apology on fb.... well, fine, (i said to fish) dun wan accept, oklar... i dun care... SAYA SUDAH JELAK DGN SIKAPNYA....... ;(

..............

Gosh.... today got poetry competition..... I wrote "IF" bla bla bla.... I dunno wat ZF write wor.... ahahaha....
So emo today...
i lashed at everyone today... scold here, scold there....
it's bcuz of him.....
Regretting everything that i did for the past year....
but like they say, Sorry no cure....
Yea... Tears in my eyes now....

I.D.I.O.T

Now, i'm wondering which idiot person who did that idiotic thing....
If like that, then the whole board will know and may get punishment lar jor jor...
IDIOT!!!!!!
Now, every one will wonder if that rumor is true.....
IDIOT!!!!!!!
Ever wonder why we always keep these things to ourselves???
CUZ WE DUN WAN TO GET IN TROUBLE!!!!!!
Stupid.... anatawa baka desu!!!!!
Now F.U.R.I.O.U.S at the person who did this lar...
Come on lar...
If the person who did this is the one i thought who did, tat person will get in trouble too....
THINK BEFORE YOU SAY!!!!!!

Our family.... :)

Eldest: Joey
2nd: ZF
3rd: Yours truly!!!
4th: WHY
5th: Fishie
6th: Zhiqian

Yea... Our family tree... Now, busy doing all of our school projects that are due tmr, nxt week, bla bla bla... :)

Muackzzz,
Renesmee2004

New here!!!!

Hey guyz!!!!
I'm actually a person who helps someone to write blog and now, i'm helping my best fren...
She rarely goes on9 and i begged her to make blog so here we are...
Hope u enjoy!!!!

Love lotz,

ZF :)